My Secret Diary


14th March

(Siamese Cat New Year.)


9:15 AM:          Trousers must be bored not going to work - he has spent all morning tidying the living room and rearranging the furniture.


11:20 AM:         I canít believe what my humans have done! They have stripped the wallpaper that I spent months carefully scratching into a fabulous art deco still-life. My lifeís artwork has been destroyed. Humans have no appreciation of the fine arts.


5:00 PM:          Spent the afternoon down at the canal with Lucky. We played a balancing game on the bridge. The rules are - the first player stands on the narrow ledge for four minutes, the next player stands on three legs for three minutes and so on. Even though the ledge is very narrow, I had no problem standing for four minutes. Lucky did okay on three legs. Two legs was rather difficult and I struggled hard to keep my balance. I guess cats were not aerodynamically designed for standing on one leg - Lucky fell into the canal.


11:00 p.m. Lucky met Snowball this evening; he says she wants to meet me in the park first thing tomorrow. I have spent all evening preparing a speech. I will give her an ultimatum - she must give up Killer and devote herself to me or I will devote myself to unloving her.

My speech is romantic, passionate, persuasive yet forceful - with merely a hint of pleading.


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