My Secret Diary

 

17th January

8:05 AM:         Woke up feeling itchy. I think the baby must have fleas and has given them to me.

 

6:20 PM:         The humans were still selfishly drooling over their stray so I went to see Lucky. Lucky shared his breakfast with me. Then we headed out in search of adventure. About a mile from the shops we caught the unmistakable aroma of salmon. We hurried to the Uncanned-Fish-Shop and stared longingly into the window. The counter was piled high with the most magnificent freshly caught salmon. Normally Iím a fairly law abiding catizen but the sight and smell of those delicious fish drove me a little bit crazy - I knew I had to steal one.  With Lucky watching from the doorway in utter disbelief, I crept inside and, with the prowess of a tiger, leapt onto the counter. Not being an experienced thief, I hadnít expected the fish to be covered in ice. I skidded across the counter knocking everything onto the floor. Jumping down, I grabbed a fish and bolted out the door. The fishmonger came charging after me. I suspect he might have caught me if he hadnít slipped on the ice. Fortunately Lucky broke his fall or he might have been badly injured. I dragged the fish into the bushes and waited for Lucky. When he finally arrived he complained that he was too sore to eat - so I had no option but to eat the huge salmon all by myself. Lucky was feeling dizzy (this seems to be an unfortunate side effect of being squashed by a fishmonger) and I had to help him to his house. It was fortunate that I did; his humans had just served his dinner and it would have been a shame for moderately good food to go to waste. While Lucky took a nap I scoffed it for him Ė well thatís what friends are for.

 

11:40 PM:       This evening I reflected on how badly my humans treat me Ė they have not fed me all day. I am starving to death! If I knew how to use the telephone I would call the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.



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