9:01 AM: Due to the noise, smell and
continuing neglect I am forced to run away from home.
9:02 AM: I have decided to live in
Acorn Avenue. Itís a nice posh street and quite suitable for a
cat of my superior breeding. Goodbye Number 42 Hazel Drive. To
be honest, I donít know why I put up with rundown Hazel Drive
for so long.
11:43 PM: Iím back home again, having
failed to find suitable alternative accommodation!
My search began at number 2 Acorn Avenue. I
discovered the back door had been left wide open. That seemed a
good sign so I immediately decided to adopt this family.
Excitedly I hurried inside to meet my new humans. There was no
one to greet me; no welcoming committee, no fanfare Ė how
inconsiderate! Undeterred, I helped myself to a huge bowl of
then settled down, on a comfy armchair, and made myself at home.
What a shock I got when I spotted Killer sleeping on the other
chair. I made a very, very, very hasty (but quiet) retreat. Can
you believe it - a delinquent cat like Killer living in Acorn
Next I tried howling outside numbers 4
through 46 in the expectation of being welcomed in. There was
obviously nobody at home in any of these houses for the doors
remained firmly closed Ė except at number 38 where a sweet
looking little old lady threw a bucket of water over me.
There was a rottweiler at number 48 so I
quickly skipped through gardens 50 to 94 with the beast in hot
pursuit. Number 96, was answered by a human wearing a tight,
black t-shirt with ďDeath to CatsĒ emblazed across the front.
His bulging arms were completely covered in tattoos of snakes
and lady humans. He is obviously a mass murderer. Although he
shouted after me, ďCome here cute little kitty,Ē I didnít dare
stop. I certainly wasnít volunteering to be his next victim.
I ran to my garden shed and hid, just in case
the rochwieller and the mass murderer were still searching for
me. I crawled under my worry blanket and immediately fell asleep
- I didnít realize running away was so tiring. I snoozed for the
rest of the day then crept into my bedroom to continue hiding.
I am a fugitive, forced to go underground in
my own bedroom.
I am now even angrier with my humans, for
they donít care that I have run away.