My Secret Diary


3rd March


After breakfast I went into the garden to find a nice spot to sleep. I was minding my own business just staring aimlessly through the fence into the neighbor’s garden. Brutus was there, using all of his intelligence to chew the skeleton of an expired cow. After a while he noticed me staring at him and stopped chewing.

“Hello,” he said slowly.

I ignored him completely.

“Let’s be friends,” he said with a grin. “Come and join me for a little bite.”

I remembered my resolution to promote peace between cats, dogs and mice. Perhaps not all dogs are evil. Maybe if I could make friends with just one it would be the first step in ending the Cat-Dog-Cold-War that has gone on for millennia! Like a mouse sniffing the cheese on a mouse-trap I accepted his offer. Through my friendly disposition, I almost became the first cat in outer space without the aid of a rocket.

The moment I stepped through the fence the horrid beast grabbed me by the tail. He swung me round and round and round until I was as dizzy as a hamster on a battery operated wheel with the on-off switch stuck in the on position. As the world blurred into a grey haze, he released his grip. Up, up, up I went heading straight towards the sun. Suddenly I stopped in mid sky. For a moment I thought I would be stuck there forever but I began falling - rapidly. Fortunately a tree broke my fall and I ended up dangling from its branches with the stupid mutt snarling at my heels. Luckily, when I fell from the tree, I ended up on my side of the fence or I would be shredded cat by now.


I have added a new resolution to my list, “I will get revenge on that stupid, evil, delinquent brute Brutus.”


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