a Pretty Average Father
Father’s day trivia
Father's Day is
the ninth most popular card-sending holiday – just slightly less
popular than Groundhog Day and Rogation Sunday.
Neckties are top
of the list of Father’s Day gifts. Psychiatrist Dr. Isa
Mannaitter suggests that this is because of the similarities
between the tie and the noose.
Day began in 1910 after UK card publisher Ripoff Press
manufactured too many Mother’s Day cards. They overprinted the
word “Mother” with “Father” and, voilà!, suddenly dad was
The five worst fathers of all time (allegedly!!)
Marvin Gay, Sr.
Marvin had three children, one being the legendary soul-R&B singer
Marvin Gay(e) who’s best known songs include I Heard It Through
Gay, Sr., was a minister in the House of God, a conservative
Christian sect. He was a great lover of vodka and a zealous
cross-dresser. Despite his own bizarre behaviour he imposed strict
codes of conduct on his children. In fact, throughout Marvin Jr.’s
childhood, his father beat him on an almost daily basis.
Marvin Sr. resented his son’s fame but was happy to live off his
fortune. The relationship between the two became increasingly
turbulent, as Marvin Jr. spiralled deeper into drug-induced
During a heated argument, on April Fool's Day, 1984, (the day before
Marvin Jr.'s 45th birthday) Marvin Sr. shot his son twice in the
chest with a gun his son had bought him. Within hours Marvin Jr. was
dead. In prison, Marvin was asked if he loved his son. He replied,
"Let's say that I didn't dislike him."
of the matter is that polar bears are just not cut out for the life
of fatherhood and they make no attempt at trying. A male will bugger
off immediately after mating (without even giving his phone number)
leaving the female to find a council house, claim social security
and bring up all the cubs on her own. If that wasn’t bad enough, if
he has trouble finding enough seals to duff up and eat he’ll arrive
home, giving some lame excuse about having been on a business trip
for the past six months and, when mummy isn’t looking, he’ll devour
his little darlings. To be fair to the poor lad, he has to live in
sub-zero conditions on a diet of seal blubber so you have to feel
some sympathy for him!
Shakespeare's character, Titus, may make the excuse that he
shouldn’t be on this list as he is a fictitious character. But on
the grounds that he typifies cruel Roman Generals he stays – and
it’s my list, so there!
A domineering father, he certainly showed his son, Mutius, who was
boss. Titus wanted to marry off his daughter, Lavinia, to the son of
a friend. But Lavinia had other plans for she was in love. Mutius
helped the loving couple elope. In a rage Titus killed him for his
However, he did have a caring side for when Lavinia was raped and
mutilated (her hands were cut off and her tongue cut out to stop her
telling who had raped her) Titus killed her so she would not have to
endure the shame that, at that time, went with being raped. And, as
a cool act of revenge, he made mince pies out of the two rapists and
fed them to their parents. Nice touch!